this 24 hours is the hardest, i think. it started last night at our banquet. hearing all of my newest best friends speak about their experiences, growth, and feelings for the children we work with really melted my heart. i may or may not have been weeping like a child throughout most of it. i've learned so much from the girls i'm serving with. each of them has something incredible to offer and is unique and beautiful in their own right. they are my family.
i'm not good with goodbyes. i never really have been. and i know that. but i didn't think that saying goodbye to my babies and the workers at the orphanage would be this hard. i don't want to leave ecuador. i feel like i could do this for another 6 months and be completely content. this is my home now. these are my people. this is where i belong. i feel like everything i've done in my life up to this point has been insignificant and selfish. i like the way i feel when i'm with them. i like the way they love me. and the way they accept me.
i'm trying to be happy. i'm trying to take with me everything i've learned, experienced, and felt. but it's really hard. my heart has never felt so broken. tonight we're going out to eat and then i'll say goodbye to everybody. ariel and i leave the house at 4:30 tomorrow morning. at least i'll have her. she knows how i feel and won't think i'm a freak if i break down in the miami airport.
here's to the best three months of my life. here's to my babies, my sisters, my ecuadorian friends. here's to changes. here's to the new me. let's go.
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