thanksygivegive

today,

i am thankful for:

my family, especially my mom

my real friends

the opportunity i have to get an education

everyone who's helping me get to ecuador (in just 35 days!)

the army, marine, navy, and air force men i call my friends and family

arms to hug with, and hands to hold

my talents

clean laundry

cars and planes to get me to my family

music; making it, listening to it, lyrics that express the things i cannot, and the people i share it with

my trials and the things i learn from them

all kinds of love

letters from my friends serving missions

traditions, new and old

my obsession with the spanish language

money that makes my life easier

that i am who i am

the miracle of forgiveness

the gospel i am a part of

and, my God

happy thanksgiving all, eat up :)

i love it when you call me big papi

my day consisted of:

toast

driving downtown

the stratosphere with amalia

the big shot at the stratosphere

getting hit on by egyptian men

taking pictures with egyptian men

$20 memories

being annoyed by my family

thai food at pin kaow

driving around with tun

playing pool with amalia and tun

watching parenthood and glee by myself

and

sneaking apple pie at midnight

happy wednesday, all

:)

this, right now

i have the worst feeling ever

and i only know partially what it's from

but i dont like it

not one bit

and i hope it goes away soon

because i dont like feeling

sad, or confused, or hurt, or scared, or angry

i.hate.it.

and i want everything to be perfect again

thats all i want

please :(

...and my procrastinative tendencies kick in

i should be doing homework,

or showering,

or doing something productive

but i'm not in the mood

so instead,

i'm listening to wordplay that i got in the mail yesterday thanks to a one david starkweather

whilst i look at pics from last night

last night

we went on a scavenger hunt on the strip

and when i say "we" i mean...

me

juelaine

shelby

kyle

joel

tun

dennis

kiah

jared

dallan

tyler

and a bunch of weirdos whose names i don't know

it was completely fantastic

the list included, but was not limited to:

shaking the change out of a teammate's pockets

kissing a teammate through glass (my personal favorite)

something about a goofy hat? i don't even know

have a cop pretend to arrest you (even though that was pretty typical of joel)

human bridge

walk out of the bathroom with toilet paper on your shoe

human pyramid

get a kiss from a stranger

trade clothes (he stretched out my northface, booo)

do the limbo

i just love my joel

...and my shelby

the rest we didn't get pics of cause we took videos of them

but they were...

propose to somebody (dallan prosposed to a lady in mcdonalds)

get somebody to teach you the duggie (these little black boys taught us, and their moms were all into it... so awesome)

get somebody to serenade you (this jamaican guy sung "take a look at my girlfriend" to me haha)

arm wrestle a stranger, and they have to lose

i don't remember the rest

but it was all pretty great

and then, like usual, we ended the night at in-n-out

happy (a)fternoon

good (e)vening

let me just tell you how cute my grandpa was

while he and my grandma were dating

she was in school, in provo

and he was working, in tracy california

and he would drive twelve hours

(each way) to see her

every weekend

go ahead and tell me that's not love

anyways

when my grandma got home from shopping today

she came in the house and goes,

"paaaaaaige! i have something for yoooouuuu!"

would you like to know what that something was?

it was mail

for me

my david mail

that i have been waiting freaking forever for

and it absolutely positively 100% made.my.day.

also

i cannot wait to see this guy tomorrow

sucksucksuck

holidays have been hard the last two years

actually, they completely suck

because exactly two years ago,

on december 2nd,

my grandpa passed away

and now thanksgiving and christmas

remind me of him

and it sucks

because i miss him every day

my man

the other day my friend abbey made a list of all the qualities she wants in her perfect boy, and i decided since i haven't made one of those since i was like 12, that it was probably time to update it :)

therefore, off we go...

• he has to be taller than i am, speak another language, be musically inclined and mildly attractive. those are my only shallow/physical requirements haha
• he has to make me laugh. i absolutely cannot be with somebody who doesn't have a sense of humor.
• he has to be romantic and spontaneous, but only sometimes.
• he has to like my music. i think telling someone they have a good taste in music is probably one of the best compliments you can give someone. and liking the same music makes car rides much more enjoyable.
• he has to have goals and plans and dreams. i don't want to be with someone who is content with not growing and changing and doing things with his life. ambitious people are happier, and more successful.
• he has to love me and respect me for who i am. he has to love the things about me that i don't even love about myself. he has to want to be better everyday with me and grow along side of me.
• he has to love his family, especially his mom and sisters. because that is how he'll treat me. my family is everything to me. and he has to appreciate that.
• he has to get along with my family and my friends. i can't be with somebody who my family and friends don't love. when you marry someone, you marry their family too.
• he has to take me to the temple. i think that's the most important. i can't and won't settle for anything less than a temple marriage.

i think this is probably a work in progress. but it's at least better and more realistic than the list i made when i was 12. so, you know...

i want a love like johnny and june, like noah and allie, like my grandma and grandpa

that's all, really